Still Small Voice

UPDATE: I wrote this story about 5 weeks ago so it’s a little past due, but it’s funny now so I feel okay posting it. LOL Thanks for reading!! <3

Sooooo I experienced my first anxiety ridden adventure with my baby girl. I’m sure a lot of mama’s out there have gone through what I’m about to share and much worse but thus far I haven’t had to worry too much, so the following story was a bit tense for my liking.

A few weeks ago I was visiting my family. It went great! I love seeing my family. It’s nice that they are only about an hour and a half away too. Well I decided to head back home later in the evening to avoid traffic. Usually the drive is totally fine. I’m used to it, familiar with the roads, and know what times to drive and not drive. But that night right when I was leaving, I had a feeling that I should wait. You know, that still small voice? Yeah, the one we so often push aside. I justified me ignoring my intuition by saying that Serenity just ate 45 mins prior and was sound asleep. So I left.

The drive went well for 45 minutes. I got past the border patrol check point, past the boobs (the two old nuclear plants on the side of the 5 freeway), and was on my way to almost being home. Suddenly I had a strong feeling that Serenity was going to wake up hungry. Then I started thinking, ‘what if I run into traffic? What if she starts crying? What if I’m stuck on the freeway where there are no exits? No…that wont happen, I’m just worrying for no reason.” Right as I, once again, pushed aside my discernment, I saw brake lights ahead of me. I called Jeff to ask him if he could look to see what was causing the traffic and how long it would be. As I was asking him, Serenity woke up and started immediately crying. I started to silently freak out because I was in the fast lane and would have to get over 5 lanes, in traffic, with my infant crying. At that point I had caught up with the brake lights, and was stuck in a parking lot on the freeway. NO ONE, I repeat, NO ONE would let me over for about 10 minutes. SO rude! The cars started moving about 5mph, Serenity was screaming, I was crying, and Jeff was patiently consoling me on the phone. He stayed on the phone with me the whole time (best husband in the world award goes to Jeffrey Sparrow!).  I decided to become the rude driver where I just forced my way in front of cars whether or not they were letting me. Stupid idea because I almost got into a car crash. Thankfully no one hit anyone, I was able to get all the way over…but now there was no exit for miles. I had to pull over on the side of the freeway, leave my car on, turn on my hazards, climb into the back seat, and breastfeed my poor screaming, hungry, red-faced baby. “Phew, I did it”, I thought, “now I just hope no one tries to help me.” It was the one time that I wanted our society to be selfish and continue driving instead of checking to see if I needed help with my car.

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Breastfeeding went fine and my baby girl was happy. So happy in fact that she let out a huge fart/poo noise, with a smile of course. Side note: she is the cutest pooper ever! She smiles every time. And it reminds me that God has a very funny sense of humor. He could have made babies cry or scowl or frown, but He made them smile when they fart and poop. lol…our God is awesome. End side note. So I was sitting there finishing up with feeding Serenity when I felt something wet on my hand. You guessed it. Her big fart/poo exploded up her back, onto my clothes, and hand. Seriously child?! At that point I was thinking, ‘Why didn’t I listen to myself before leaving’. I could have saved myself so much trouble. After all, the Lord gives us that still small voice for a reason. Being the spectacular mother I am (sarcasm), I had a decision to make…try to change my baby on the dangerous side of a freeway where anyone could pop out of the bushes at any moment, or drive the rest of the way home and give Serenity a bath. I decided on the latter. I know, I know…she could have gotten a diaper rash, could have been uncomfortable, yada yada…she totally fell asleep. So, as things like this go, I was able to get back onto the freeway and the traffic cleared within 5 minutes. ARGH.

Needless to say it was an adventure to remember for future embarrassing stories at Serenity’s birthday parties and such, but I am glad it’s over and thankful we got through it. So what’s the lesson here? Ladies…and gents, but I assume most people reading this are ladies, LISTEN TO THAT VOICE!! That intuition God gave you. He gave us that discernment for many reasons and often we are too fast to brush it aside. This story was just a minor thing, but what if that voice is telling you to give that homeless man $5, or check to see if there are any parents around for that child that is alone in the grocery aisle. You never know when that voice is leading you to do or not do something that can change someone’s life or even the world. That homeless man could be the next inspirational speaker because someone was kind enough to give him $5. That child alone in the grocery store aisle could be the next CEO of a non-profit like Big Brothers, Big Sisters because someone took the time to make sure they were okay. Listen to what God is telling you, after all, He knows best.


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